Patient arrived at clinic exhibiting clear symptoms of Acute Brain-Rot Slop Syndrome. When asked to describe their state of emotion, patient reported “ngl, it’s kinda joever right now.” When asked to elaborate, the patient responded with “holy yap.”

Hi, protein! High protein! Cleanse your mind of all other “p” words in your lexicon. The past? The present? The pernicious passing parcels of peace? There is only one “p” that matters here: “PROTEIN!”

Hey Mates! Welcome to “Creature Watch,” your favorite show about nature’s most peculiar creations. Here in the Joseph Mark Lauinger Memorial Library, we’ve caught sight of an elusive creature in its natural habitat. Say hello to the Homo chattiusgptius!